What Not To Do With "1"

Eight things the number "1" should be:

• The U.S. Route I'm cruising from Jacksonville south to Key West.



• Superbowl chant preceded by "We're number..."



• What two shall become at the altar.



• The 'table for' you need when dining alone.



• Keychain dangly-thingy for your significant other, e.g. #1 Luvly.



• The likely reason for a visit to the little boys' room.



• The penultimate prelude to Auld Lang Syne.



• A Grand Prix racing Formula designation.

The one thing the number "1" should not be:

• The temperature on a sunny Saturday morning. Give me 2. Or even 1 below. But not 1. It just seems wrong.